The Plastic Couch Cover That Changed How I Think About Life

I've been thinking about my grandparents lately.

My grandmother would put plastic covers on the couch—you know, the kind that made sitting down sound like opening a bag of chips. She and my grandfather saved up for a Cadillac and would put a car cover on it even though it was kept safely in the garage. After the cover, they’d put quilts on top of that.

At the time, it seemed a bit much. But looking back now, I’m struck by the depth of care. The level of intentionality they brought to their lives. There was a sense of purpose in how they cared for their things, their home, their relationships. They didn’t buy a lot of things. And what they bought, they would care for it with intention.

They took their time with everything. Nothing was rushed or automatic. Everything was done on purpose.

Today, we're all moving so fast. We're skimming the surface of life with so much flying at us that it's easy to become frantic and fragmented. And somewhere in all that speed, we lose something my grandparents had: the ability to live with intention.

USC researcher Wendy Wood discovered that nearly half of what we do each day runs on autopilot—triggered by our environment, not by conscious choice. 

We think we're deciding, but we're just reacting.

When you think about it this way, about half of your day is happening automatically.

We're what she calls "reason-making machines." We're constantly explaining to ourselves why we made certain choices, but most of the time, we didn't actually choose at all. We just reacted based on habit and circumstance.

You wake up, check your phone (automatic). Drive the same route to work (automatic). Order your usual coffee (automatic). Respond to emails in the same way you always do (automatic).

None of these are necessarily bad things, but they raise an important question: How much of your life are you actually living on purpose?

There's this helpful metaphor about an elephant and its rider. Picture yourself as both—you're the rider trying to direct where you go, but you're also the elephant with all its automatic behaviors and instincts.

The rider likes to think it's in complete control, but the elephant is much stronger. The elephant represents all those automatic responses, those habits, those unconscious patterns that drive so much of what we do.

The key isn't to fight the elephant—it's to take care of it, to get to know it, and to train it. Create the right environment so that when your elephant acts automatically, it's moving toward what you actually want.

This is where purpose comes in, and it's different from how most people think about it.

Purpose isn't some grand, cosmic calling you discover once and then you're set for life. Purpose is much more practical than that.

Purpose isn't a destination to reach—it's more like the map and the compass you come back to. It's regularly asking yourself: 'Am I doing this on purpose, or am I just going through the motions?’

Am I thinking, feeling, and acting in ways that align with my vision and values?"

When I think about purpose, it comes back to mindfulness—how do I, in this present moment, slow down so that my responses aren't automatic but intentional?

It's the difference between reacting and responding. Between going through the motions and engaging fully with what's in front of you.

You could spend time identifying your values and never think about them again. You could create a clear vision for your life and then file it away somewhere.

Without this purpose feedback loop—without regularly asking yourself whether you're living on purpose—it's easy to lose sight of where you're going and get lost in the chaos of everything coming at you.

Your values and vision give you direction. Purpose is what keeps you on course.

The most successful people I know in hospitality aren't necessarily the ones with the most talent or the best circumstances. They're the ones who regularly create space to ask themselves tough questions:

This isn't about perfection. It's about awareness. It's about catching yourself when you're operating on autopilot and choosing to engage more intentionally.

This week, catch yourself in the act. Notice when you're sleepwalking versus when you're fully awake. The goal isn't perfection—it's awareness.

Take care,

Josh

P.S. Next week, I want to share a story about hospital janitors that completely changed how I think about finding purpose in our daily work—even when that work doesn't feel particularly meaningful on the surface.

You don't have to wait for the perfect job or the perfect circumstances to live with purpose. You can bring intention and meaning to whatever you're doing right now.